How to Be Confident On Your Wedding Day

By Taylor Rhyne

Owner of Lemons & Willow Event Management

Host of the Dazed & Engaged Wedding Planning Advice Podcast

Some little girls dream about their wedding day - getting dressed up in an ostentatious wedding gown, proclaiming their feelings to their one true love out loud and having it witnessed by hundreds of their family and friends.

And some of you imagine yourselves in that scenario and think that sounds absolutely terrifying. A big dress that I have to walk in... in HEELS? Public speaking?! ALL THOSE EYES STARING AT ME?!

I hear you, friend. And I’ve heard it from brides over and over again throughout the years both in my planning business and as couples write into my podcast to ask for help. The most common way of it being said - “I’m not a big ‘center of attention’ person and I’m not super confident in myself, is there a way to have the big wedding but not feel like I’m being stared at all day?”.

And the answer - OF COURSE. Your wedding day is completely customizable and you don’t have to feel self conscious and defeated going into that big day. I’m here to give you 3 tangible ways to not only feel confident on your wedding day, but to change the way you view yourself and your wedding.

1. Surround yourself with supportive people ONLY.

Now, this may seem like a given, but wedding planning has a way of drawing friends and family out of the woodwork with their “helpful” opinions and varying levels of wanting to be involved. When choosing your bridal party and filtering through all the well-meaning advice, truly ask yourself “Would I seek this person out for advice in a hard season in my life?”. If the answer is no, then take their opinion with a smile and say thank you, but don’t take it to heart. If the answer is yes, have those people be your rocks during planning and on your wedding day. If you can trust them during the hard times in your life, you know they’re going to be there for you on the best day. And having a solid support system can not only make you feel good about yourself and boost your confidence, but it can give you a sounding board when you’re not feeling 100% confident about something. And remember - just because someone is family or has been a friend in the past doesn’t give them authority to be in your inner circle. You get to decide that!

2. Find vendors that make you feel confident.

Again, this may seem like a given but this can be easier said than done! Sometimes the price tag on a vendor may win out over your personal connection with another vendor, but as the old saying goes “you are a reflection of who you surround yourself with”. On wedding day, you are going to see your photographer, planner and videographer more than you might see your spouse! Those vendors especially can make or break the vibe of the day for you. Be sure to find quality people that make you feel like the most important, beautiful, happy version of yourself because their attitudes will rub off on you and can boost your confidence in more ways than one! Plus, going into your wedding with the confidence of “I have a great team that’s going to make my dream day come true” takes a lot of pressure off of you so that you can focus on the most important part - you and your spouse!

3. Remember why you’re there.

The big dress is nice. The fancy party is fun. And yes there can be a lot of pressure, feeling like everyone is staring at you (which they will be a lot of the time - you are the reason they’re there after all). But remember the real reason you are planning this wedding - because you fell in love with your person. And the biggest confidence boost of all? They fell in love with you too! They love the way you look right now, they love the fact that you might get awkward with public speaking, and they love you enough to want to declare that love in front of all those eyes. So bask in that all day! Any time you’re not feeling confident on your wedding day, take a look at them and remember why you’re both there and you’ll definitely feel better - I promise!

If you’re still worried about being the center of attention, remember what I said earlier! Your wedding day is totally customizable. If you feel silly in a big dress, go more casual. If you don’t like public speaking, do a private ceremony (or elope!) and come back to do a big reception later. No marriage license requires you to pour your heart out in front of 150 people! And whether you go big or small, always remember you are perfect the way you are and it’s completely okay to feel nervous about such a big day!

Tune into the Dazed & Engaged Podcast every Wednesday to hear more advice like this and submit your own wedding planning questions as well!